The other day at Half Price, I managed to stumble onto a copy of Lustmord’s “Heresy.” Not only is this one of my favorite albums of all time but it’s also largely responsible for my creation of The Black Sunday Cult. Rest assured, kids, I snatched that shit up before somebody could. Rule #1 at Half Price: If you see something you’re dying to get, buy it immediately. Otherwise it’s guaranteed not to be there the next time you visit. I can’t tell you how many times this happened to me before I wised up.

FUN FACT OF THE WEEK (THORNE EDITION)

Since I’m a solitary person, I haven’t a clue as to who any of my neighbors are. It’s true. Every neighbor I’ve had since I’ve lived here have never introduced themselves nor have I. If someone ever wanted to search for me, it’d be like this:

Uber Hot Girl: I’m looking for Stefan *******.

Neighbor: Who?

Uber Hot Girl: Stefan *******.

Neighbor: No, we don’t buy muffins here.

Uber Hot Girl: No. I’m looking for a guy named Stefan *******. Also known as Thorne, That Creepy Guy Who Says “Boss” All The Time, Satan, etc.

Neighbor: Hmmm… That last name you mentioned sounds mighty familiar. Does he have a porno ‘stache and a long furry tail?

Uber Hot Girl: Oh, never mind!