Once again change is at my doorstep. It makes me nauseas just thinking about it. Why can’t things ever stay the same? Why can’t people be the same? Because it isn’t possible. I know this and yet I struggle with it. Why? Couldn’t I just let it go? Something inside me tells me that I should just accept it, that there’s nothing I (nor anyone else for that matter) can do to stop it.

I know I resist because I want to be remain in that constant state of happiness. But don’t we all want to be happy? Isn’t that why we always fight change? We’re afraid of losing something precious and we want that constant control to keep from losing it. Because of this, we suffer.

I know all of this.

Yet I still permit myself to suffering…